Marriage is an old institution initiated by God between husband and wife, I mean male and female.
One of the major problems while thinking of engaging in marital process, is, ‘do I know him? or does he know me? Just imagine two people with diverse upbringing, different orientation trying to live together?
God wanted a man, and not a boy, but a matured man to marry. You can be 50 years and could still be a boy, while another man that’s 30 could actually be a man! Age is not the way to know if a man is matured enough to marry. Neither is his financial status but a sense of maturity and responsibility.
A matured man is a man that has been trained by his parents, then by other people, then challenges of life, he’s a man that knows how to manage success and failures without blaming everybody, he must have been trained by his environment and finally he must have concluded his training process by his personal self training himself.(Vice Versa)
Any man that has not gone through the circle of development, is still a boy, and posses a great danger for marriage. Such men are still withing the whelp of mummy and daddy, they are easily controlled by their sisters or brother, they get approvals from people before they can make domestic decisions, they can not handle situations and challenges in a mature way without it escalating to families and friends. This applies to women as well.
As two drivers can not handle the car staring at the same time, except they want to have an accident, hence God has organised marriage in such a way that man should take a lead. But not just because he’s a male, but a man. So its important for every woman to identify their own men. Men are all different in many ways depending on many factors apart from the challenges he can handle and his ability to show utmost maturity to his wife and family generally.
A man must be able to recognize a shift from his old family to his new family (by marriage) and be able to balance between them without mishandling his marriage. He was a son or a brother in his first family, but in his new family he’s a husband to his wife and a dad to his children.
A matured man however is not a perfect man though, but the ultimate rule is the ability to manage issues or situation that may erupt in him marriage. He must recognize that his wife may not be as fast as he’s, his wife may know be as strong as he’s, she may be beautiful outside but she may be equally different inside. Then the question is, are you able to marry her with all and many of these? or can you turn these vises of your wife to gold for her?
What is your opinion or perspective to marriage?, what is your own personal values about relating with a weaker sex? I understand that if a man does not have respect for the marriage as an institution, even if he’s a nice man, he’d end up becoming a bad home builder.
If your man sees marriage as an easy get in and easy jump out narrative, if he sees every problem or challenges in a relationship or marriage as an opportunity to get out, you must think twice about this.
When you start a relationship with any man, please spend more time to build a lasting foundation that will endure any hardship you may run into in your marriage with him. How?
First, while you are dating him, spend time to observe him objectively. In most cases, while dating, men spend more time with their spouses, but will soon change after few years of marriage. Others spend money on their ladies to win them over, as soon as they win you over, they start spending less on you or more outside, i want you to ask why does this happen and how can you deal with it before it escalate?
Women, nobody can help you do this, you need your two eyes opened like globe to strictly observe his actions and make right judgement, if he tries to fool you, don’t allow him to string you along, telling you what you want to hear and treating like a queen for a moment. You must be honest with your own selves first, ensure you discuss and ask questions when you are not sure of any actions.
Some men would enjoy making you to live in assumptions, and this is a master trick of many men. They are actors on stage, they act and display all intriguing character until you soon find out their true character some years along the line. The second thing you should watch out for is, many men naturally love games, they love football, tennis, gulf, basket ball, etc. So by nature from age 1 year old as they start to move their legs, they have been playing football, some from their mothers womb, therefore, they see relationship and marriage as another form of game. So you must never play game with them but be clear, direct and honest. And when you suspect he is playing a game, call him to Order and deal with it. LET US HELP YOU EITHER YOU ARE JUST PREPARING OR YOU ARE IN A CHALLENGING MARRIAGE ALREADY WITH MATERIAL WITH TIPS YOU WILL NEVER FIND ANYWHERE ELSE. Click on this link to get more help https://familylifementors.com/index.php/product-category/dvd/